


Hello, is it me you're looking for?

by Queenofcolors



Series: winter and birdie [3]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Obsession, Paranoia, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Sleep Deprivation, Stalking, Tired Sam Wilson, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:14:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28193781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenofcolors/pseuds/Queenofcolors
Summary: Sam snapped his eyes open, he swears he heard footsteps on the hardwood floor. He turned on the bedside lamp, bending over the side of the bed to grab a metal baseball bat. Then he slowly crept out of bed, he carefully began to creep towards the front of the house, his guard up and heart racing. Sam decided at that moment tonight would be a sleepless night. He sat down on the couch placing the bat on the floor, the quiet silence of the late-night allowed his mind to wander. His thoughts wandered back to earlier that day, specifically his encounter with the Winter Soldier.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson
Series: winter and birdie [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2050218
Comments: 9
Kudos: 43





	Hello, is it me you're looking for?

Sam snapped his eyes open, he swears he heard footsteps on the hardwood floor. He turned on the bedside lamp, bending over the side of the bed to grab a metal baseball bat. Then he slowly crept out of bed, he carefully began to creep towards the front of the house, his guard up and heart racing. Sam decided at that moment tonight would be a sleepless night. He sat down on the couch placing the bat on the floor, the quiet silence of the late-night allowed his mind to wander. His thoughts wandered back to earlier that day, specifically his encounter with the Winter Soldier.

He can remember so clearly the words the soldier uttered to him оставаться в безопасности (Stay Safe). That phrase played over in his mind like a broken record. Sam remembered how he had bought a various translation book before he went on his very first army tour. He got up from the couch and began to look on the bookshelf, he vaguely remembers how he got over-excited about buying a translation book and bought one too many. He skimmed the bookshelf finding the unused English to Russian book. He decided that since he was up he might as well figure out what the soldier had said to him and how it connects to him being saved.

\--------------------------------------

Sam didn’t mean to fall asleep on the couch, but he was startled by the sound of the doorbell. The English to Russian book made a thud noise as it hit the ground and Sam tripped over the baseball bat. His dreams were filled with the scene of the Winter Soldier ripping his wings and holding him close to his chest before taking the impact of the fall. This was accompanied by the soft and huskiness of the soldier uttering a phrase he did not understand. Sam went to the door to see Natasha holding two cups of coffee and a bag with bagels.

“Rough night?” Natasha asked as Sam kicked the baseball bat under the couch, hoping she didn’t notice. He caught Natasha looking at the cover of the English to Russian book, if she had noticed she didn’t comment on it.

“Yeah, it’s not every day you come home from fighting the Russians for the third time this week,” Sam chuckled dryly but there was a sense of paranoia in his voice. Ever since he received the flowers he has been scared that someone or something is watching him.

“You okay?” Natasha squinted her eyes at him making him squirm. It’s not that Sam didn’t want to tell her that someone broke into his home and that the Winter Soldier uttered unknown words that made goosebumps rise on his arms. He just was scared to admit any of this to himself. Scared to admit that he wishes to hear the huskiness of the soldier’s voice again because it reminded him of a long-dead and unforgotten love.

“Yeah, just a little shaken up to know that Steve's still in the hospital. But what’s up? Is Steve getting out of the hospital?” Sam hoped it was a convincing enough lie to give him time to sort out his thoughts. 

“He heals fast with the serum but the doctors still want him to rest. But I came by to say I have a lead Winter...Bucky was spotted in Texas. He was seen taking out a hydra ring,” Natasha said, Sam felt a rush of anxiety and excitement at the thought of them being able to catch the soldier. On one hand, he would be happy to reunite the soldier with Steve but on another had he was still skeptical of the soldier.

“Why would the soldier be in Texas?” Sam didn’t understand why Natasha was giving him a weird look.

“Why are you calling him soldier? His name is Bucky?” Natasha said, making Sam ponder for a moment. He had been internally and externally calling Bucky the soldier. He began to realize that calling him the soldier dehumanized him and a part of him didn’t want to face the fact he used to be something other than the soldier.

“Sam? You alright?” Natasha said gently, snapping Sam at his thoughts, he mustered up his best fake smile.

“Yeah, I’m alright so we’re going to Texas to get Bucky?” Sam said with tired eyes but his voice firm, trying to convince her he was fine, even though his bones ached and his mind was clouded.

\------------

The building was ablaze and Steve was cursing his head off, Natasha had determined that the soldier couldn’t have gotten far but insisted they get food and a good night's sleep. That’s how they found themselves at a small dinner and Sam so deep in his thoughts replaying the event from two days ago he almost missed Steve complaining.

“I just don’t understand; why would Buck come out here?” Steve grunted as Sam thought that just maybe the soldier didn’t want to be found. But a part of Sam knew that wasn’t the truth that if the soldier didn’t want to be found he wouldn’t have left such a messy sight at the hydra base.

“Sam? Sam? You alright?” Natasha said, nudging him. Sam gave a fake yawn, knowing it wouldn’t truly convince her but Steve yawning as well sealed the deal.

“Just tired, I think I’m just jet-lagged,” Sam yawned once again this time it wasn’t fake and Steve let out a grunt in agreement.

\-----------

Sam was glad to finally be alone with his thoughts as he pushed the key card into the door. The hotel was generic with floral wallpaper and a white linen queen-sized bed that was stiff. Sam froze when he noticed a note sitting on the desk, the note looked as if it had been torn out of a notebook. Next to the note was a blown up security camera picture of Sam outside the airport terminal earlier that day. His breathing quickened as he picked up the note and began to read the note out loud.

“You’re a free bird and I'm a caged bird, I like seeing you free,” Sam’s voice was shaky as he read the almost illegible words, tears began to fall on Sam’s cheeks. At that moment Sam couldn’t deny it anymore, that haunting feeling he had felt ever since the soldier had saved him.

“Bucky?” Sam called out to Bucky Barnes in the empty room hoping that he could give him the answers he needed but knowing that Bucky was probably onto his next destructive rampage.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment


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